Dating vs. Marriage

I was catching up with an old friend a couple of days ago. After all the how have you been, what's new, then he asked me if I thought being married was easier than dating. I said “Yeah, I think so. I mean at least for me. I made some bad choices in boyfriends, and my husband was a great choice. So yeah it's easier.” That ended that or so I thought. Yesterday his question and my response came to mind. My gut response was yes it is easier and according to my 6th grade social studies teacher always go with your gut, but…I started to question myself. Easier? Maybe in the sense of I made a right choice in a mate and it is nice to have someone to share your life with it is easier. But what about when things go wrong…arguments, disagreements, stress, work, etc? It really isn't so easy then.

Marriage is a commitment, til death to you part, unless you are celebrity. For better or worse, no surprises, it is right there in the vows, the worse will come. When you are dating someone and you get into an argument, you don't have to talk to them or see them if you don't want to. Bad fights, arguments, you can walk away and never look back. Being married you are living together, you HAVE to see their face. Sure, I can (and have) walk around and ignore my husband but I would eventually have to talk to him, even if it was only about something house or kid related. The silent treatment can only last so long. When we were dating, I would blow him off for a few days if he made me mad. I wouldn't answer the phone, texts, or AIM. Now, we have to work out our differences. Period. But the best part is, there is the better. I will say it, love is better in marriage then dating. It is forgiving, understanding, deeper, and supporting. I know not everyone has had a happy relationship or marriage experience. Like I said before, I made really bad choices in boyfriends and my parents' relationship was awful, so my view on love was it was a fallacy. When we find the person we were meant to be with it makes all the difference.

Photo Credit: Jessica Smith Photography

I wanted to get some other opinions. After all, I'm married. Being married and dating is different from person to person, gender to gender. I asked my friends, married and single alike, is marriage easier than dating? Why?

After 30 years it had become easy….hahahah. Have to get back to you on the dating thing. TBD.

Lol! Dating is easier….marriage is more work. You are now living with this person everyday.
Dating you are more spontaneous…often times with marriage you just get into a groove and the spontaneity leaves…which is why marriage is more work.

I think Marriage is easier than dating. Dating was always hard for me because I felt weird meeting new people. I love being married

I can say being married for 22 years its no longer work. Wouldn't want date again I don't think i would remember how.

Ashley…..I actually loved being married. The becoming “one” was the hardest part. But once we settled into our roles….it became a true partnership. I loved being a wife….watching what made him happy and ” trying” to do those things be…

Being that I have never been married, I think there are aspects of both that are easier. When you are married there is a lot less stress between the personal relationship because you are not as worried about what the other is thinking about you or being judged by that person. In marriage you don't worry about the petty stuff. When you are dating you are constantly trying to impress the other person. Dating is carefree, you get to have your own space and your life. I like the freedom and comfort of having an out when things go bad.

Marriage is easier. You don't have to worry about finding time to spend with each other and boundaries are gone. You are free to be yourself more and be comfortable with each others bodies. There is also that commitment and peace in knowing you are sharing life and growing in Christ with this 1 other person God has placed in your life.

I think marriage is easier. No playing games or wondering if someone will call you back, or if they like you too fast, or if you're coming across as too eager or interested too soon. No stressing about whether they are the one or not. Or whether they are wasting your time. What you see is what you get because you know the person so well.

I think being single and dating is easier. You don't have to put in as much work.

Dating is a piece of cake. You carve out time and go somewhere away from the daily issues of life to spend time with each other. It's easy to get along when the only time you spend togehter is doing something fun and sometimes a problem since that's the only snapshot you see of someone when dating. When married, if you don't date, then the only time you spend with your spouse is dealing with the daily issues of life. That's why you need to date when married to continue recharging each other. Dating doesn't always mean going somewhere, but it could just be at home when you intentionally set aside time for each other (ie kids sleeping/naptime).